I turned to JESUS !!!!!
"UP UNTIL 3 AND 1/2 MONTHS AGO I WAS A PARTY ANIMAL: SMOKING, DRINKING, TAKING RECREATIVE DRUGS...THERE WERE MEN TOO. I WAS AN ATTRACTIVE PROFILE ON SITES LIKE FACEBOOK, MESSENGER AND TAGGED. I HAD A BUSY SOCIAL LIFE WHICH I HAD TO JUGGLE WITH THE FACT I HAD 2 CHILDREN.
BUT NOW LET ME TELL YOU THE HONEST TRUTH...
BEHIND ALL THAT AND INSIDE MY CLOSED DOORS... I WAS THE UNHAPPIEST THAT I HAD EVER BEEN IN LIFE! I WAS LONELY AND VERY SAD, I ATTACHED MYSELF TO MATERIAL THINGS THAT I THOUGHT WERE BRINGING ME FUN AND JOY, BUT THEN REALISED THIS FUN ONLY LASTED FOR A VERY SHORT PERIOD OF TIME.
AFTER THAT, ALL THE PAINFULL THOUGHTS AND MEMORIES OF AN ABUSIVE CHILDHOOD, REBELLIOUS TEEN AGE, AND FAILED ADULT LIFE SO FAR... ALL THEM BAD FEELINGS: ANGER, BITTERNESS, SADNESS, LONELINESS, SENSE OF LOSS, DEPRESSION, GUILTY CONSCIENCE; ALL OF IT WOULD COME UP IN MY MIND, EVERY-TIME I WASN'T HIGH OR CLUBBING, THE REAL ME WOULD RESURFACE AND IT WASN'T A PRETTY SIGHT.
I WOULD CRY AND CRY AND CRY, ALONE... AND I KNEW THEN HOW UNHAPPY I REALLY WAS.
UNTIL NEXT TIME I HAD ANOTHER ROUND OF USING AND ABUSING MY SELF -DESTRUCTION TOOLS: CIGS, ALCOHOL AND COCAINE.
NO REAL FRIENDS, BECAUSE YOU FIND PEOPLE DON'T HAVE THAT MUCH PATIENCE WHEN THEY SEE THAT YOU CAN'T ADMIT TO YOURSELF THAT THERE IS A HUGE PROBLEM, OR THEY SIMPLY ARE TOO BUSY WITH THEIR OWN PROBLEMS TO EVEN CARE FOR WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH. I STARTED USING COCAINE AS A COMFORT MEDICINE FOR MY HEART, AND MIND, AS I HAD COME OUT OF A FAILED RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE WHO I FELT HAD LET ME DOWN DEEPLY. SO COCAINE WAS THE NEXT BEST THING, I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT PEOPLE REALLY.
BUT I WAS BECOMING RECKLESS AND COLD HEARTED AND COULDN'T EVEN SEE IT. I WOULD END UP TRYING TO END MY LIFE IN A DECISION TO BURN MYSELF ALIVE, FORTUNATELY MY ATTEMPT WAS UNSUCCESSFUL.
DISCONNECTED FROM FAMILY I SPENT MY TIME FILLING MY LIFE WITH DRUGS AND DRINKING , TRYING TO NUMB THE PAIN AND STOP THINKING ABOUT MY PROBLEMS. I NEGLECTED MY KIDS, I ALMOST GOT SECTIONED AS I WAS SO HIGH THAT YOU COULDN'T TELL WHAT I WAS ON.
AND ONE DAY, 4 AND HALF MONTHS AGO I GOT ARRESTED AND CHARGED WITH 3 SERIOUS COUNTS.
THAT DAY STARTED FOR ME ... A NEW CHAPTER OF MY LIFE.
THROWN IN A CELL NAKED, I FELT AS THOUGH I HAD ALSO BEEN SPIRITUALLY STRIPPED. IN DESPAIR, I BEGAN TO CRY OUT LOUD TO GOD!"
BUT NOW LET ME TELL YOU THE HONEST TRUTH...
BEHIND ALL THAT AND INSIDE MY CLOSED DOORS... I WAS THE UNHAPPIEST THAT I HAD EVER BEEN IN LIFE! I WAS LONELY AND VERY SAD, I ATTACHED MYSELF TO MATERIAL THINGS THAT I THOUGHT WERE BRINGING ME FUN AND JOY, BUT THEN REALISED THIS FUN ONLY LASTED FOR A VERY SHORT PERIOD OF TIME.
AFTER THAT, ALL THE PAINFULL THOUGHTS AND MEMORIES OF AN ABUSIVE CHILDHOOD, REBELLIOUS TEEN AGE, AND FAILED ADULT LIFE SO FAR... ALL THEM BAD FEELINGS: ANGER, BITTERNESS, SADNESS, LONELINESS, SENSE OF LOSS, DEPRESSION, GUILTY CONSCIENCE; ALL OF IT WOULD COME UP IN MY MIND, EVERY-TIME I WASN'T HIGH OR CLUBBING, THE REAL ME WOULD RESURFACE AND IT WASN'T A PRETTY SIGHT.
I WOULD CRY AND CRY AND CRY, ALONE... AND I KNEW THEN HOW UNHAPPY I REALLY WAS.
UNTIL NEXT TIME I HAD ANOTHER ROUND OF USING AND ABUSING MY SELF -DESTRUCTION TOOLS: CIGS, ALCOHOL AND COCAINE.
NO REAL FRIENDS, BECAUSE YOU FIND PEOPLE DON'T HAVE THAT MUCH PATIENCE WHEN THEY SEE THAT YOU CAN'T ADMIT TO YOURSELF THAT THERE IS A HUGE PROBLEM, OR THEY SIMPLY ARE TOO BUSY WITH THEIR OWN PROBLEMS TO EVEN CARE FOR WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH. I STARTED USING COCAINE AS A COMFORT MEDICINE FOR MY HEART, AND MIND, AS I HAD COME OUT OF A FAILED RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE WHO I FELT HAD LET ME DOWN DEEPLY. SO COCAINE WAS THE NEXT BEST THING, I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT PEOPLE REALLY.
BUT I WAS BECOMING RECKLESS AND COLD HEARTED AND COULDN'T EVEN SEE IT. I WOULD END UP TRYING TO END MY LIFE IN A DECISION TO BURN MYSELF ALIVE, FORTUNATELY MY ATTEMPT WAS UNSUCCESSFUL.
DISCONNECTED FROM FAMILY I SPENT MY TIME FILLING MY LIFE WITH DRUGS AND DRINKING , TRYING TO NUMB THE PAIN AND STOP THINKING ABOUT MY PROBLEMS. I NEGLECTED MY KIDS, I ALMOST GOT SECTIONED AS I WAS SO HIGH THAT YOU COULDN'T TELL WHAT I WAS ON.
AND ONE DAY, 4 AND HALF MONTHS AGO I GOT ARRESTED AND CHARGED WITH 3 SERIOUS COUNTS.
THAT DAY STARTED FOR ME ... A NEW CHAPTER OF MY LIFE.
THROWN IN A CELL NAKED, I FELT AS THOUGH I HAD ALSO BEEN SPIRITUALLY STRIPPED. IN DESPAIR, I BEGAN TO CRY OUT LOUD TO GOD!"
God sent His Spirit down to meet with me...
"Yes, I began to shout out to God!
I remembered then, how I used to weep in my room as a child, for God to come get me. In that cell I wished again that He would come and open His ears and heart to me.
And you know what? My supplication was heard!
God's Glory came down on me that day. When the sergeant had already decided that I was to have no bail until court day - which would be in 2 days time, (my kids would have had to go into care!). GOD sent His Angels to work on the sergeant's intellect and to have the sergeant change their decision and let me go home. Because God heard me, I made the decision that from then on, my life and my children's would be in His hands. I didn't want to let go of Someone with so much Power and Authority! Most of all with so much Love!
He came down from His Holy Place to Rescue me! A broken woman that no one gave the time of day to.
HE GOT MY HEART AND MY ATTENTION!!
So within the same week, I had asked an old christian friend to come and pray for me.
I BELIEVED that, in the Power of Jesus name I would be free from my old life and all that came with it.
She came and that day God began to work in my life in a Magnificent way.
Over a 2 hour period my friend and a friend of hers, (that she brought with her), prayed intensely for me.
They prayed that Jesus would come into my life and release me from negative forces that had a hold of me, the Spirit of God, through them, made me renounce out loud everything that was negative in my life, drugs and drink, hate and bitterness, fear, depression. I had to let go of grudges I had held against people, ie: my ex, I had to forgive which I confess was really hard to do. I had to confess my sins and ask God to forgive me and take my burdens.
In the Bible, Jesus says:
"come to Me, all of you who labor and are heavy-laden and over burdened, and I will cause you to rest - I will ease and relieve and refresh your souls."
Mathew 11:28
I TELL YOU...HE DID JUST THAT FOR ME!
Then they left. I was on peaceful ground, my house was a sacred place and I knew God was there with me. That was it, He had cemented His Grace in me, I felt reborn and since that day I have not touched any kind of substance, everything was removed from my life for good. God is so amazing that He even took any desire of taking anything. I feel like I have never even touched anything like that. I changed my image, my way of speaking, the way I acted with people and my kids.
I learned how to love, and love anyone I see, or shall I say any soul, as now I am eager to win souls for Jesus, and stop people on the sad journeys they are on... to HELL, If they don't find out the truth and accept Jesus as their true Saviour.
And so, I am now a child of God. One that lives only to do His will, as this project shows.
This is a simple and humble website, it may lack "shine", but it has the most valuable message in the universe:
That Jesus Christ is our Lord and Saviour, and He can heal hearts and souls, and Restore happiness and love to anyone who is ready to Accept Him in their Lives.
HE IS THE ONLY WAY TO THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN AND TO GOD!!
I did and for that, I am eternally grateful to My Lord! Now I know, that whatever may come my way, I will always have Jesus watching over me, making sure I am ok!"
Sonia - February - 2010
I remembered then, how I used to weep in my room as a child, for God to come get me. In that cell I wished again that He would come and open His ears and heart to me.
And you know what? My supplication was heard!
God's Glory came down on me that day. When the sergeant had already decided that I was to have no bail until court day - which would be in 2 days time, (my kids would have had to go into care!). GOD sent His Angels to work on the sergeant's intellect and to have the sergeant change their decision and let me go home. Because God heard me, I made the decision that from then on, my life and my children's would be in His hands. I didn't want to let go of Someone with so much Power and Authority! Most of all with so much Love!
He came down from His Holy Place to Rescue me! A broken woman that no one gave the time of day to.
HE GOT MY HEART AND MY ATTENTION!!
So within the same week, I had asked an old christian friend to come and pray for me.
I BELIEVED that, in the Power of Jesus name I would be free from my old life and all that came with it.
She came and that day God began to work in my life in a Magnificent way.
Over a 2 hour period my friend and a friend of hers, (that she brought with her), prayed intensely for me.
They prayed that Jesus would come into my life and release me from negative forces that had a hold of me, the Spirit of God, through them, made me renounce out loud everything that was negative in my life, drugs and drink, hate and bitterness, fear, depression. I had to let go of grudges I had held against people, ie: my ex, I had to forgive which I confess was really hard to do. I had to confess my sins and ask God to forgive me and take my burdens.
In the Bible, Jesus says:
"come to Me, all of you who labor and are heavy-laden and over burdened, and I will cause you to rest - I will ease and relieve and refresh your souls."
Mathew 11:28
I TELL YOU...HE DID JUST THAT FOR ME!
Then they left. I was on peaceful ground, my house was a sacred place and I knew God was there with me. That was it, He had cemented His Grace in me, I felt reborn and since that day I have not touched any kind of substance, everything was removed from my life for good. God is so amazing that He even took any desire of taking anything. I feel like I have never even touched anything like that. I changed my image, my way of speaking, the way I acted with people and my kids.
I learned how to love, and love anyone I see, or shall I say any soul, as now I am eager to win souls for Jesus, and stop people on the sad journeys they are on... to HELL, If they don't find out the truth and accept Jesus as their true Saviour.
And so, I am now a child of God. One that lives only to do His will, as this project shows.
This is a simple and humble website, it may lack "shine", but it has the most valuable message in the universe:
That Jesus Christ is our Lord and Saviour, and He can heal hearts and souls, and Restore happiness and love to anyone who is ready to Accept Him in their Lives.
HE IS THE ONLY WAY TO THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN AND TO GOD!!
I did and for that, I am eternally grateful to My Lord! Now I know, that whatever may come my way, I will always have Jesus watching over me, making sure I am ok!"
Sonia - February - 2010